Single AF

In January my friend, Colleen, told me she got engaged over the holidays. I was very happy and excited for her. Marriage and children is one of her biggest goals in life so I was thrilled that it’s finally happening for her. Turns out her wedding is going to be on the same day as our mutual friend, Amelia. Is there an image of your head that this is going to be like Bride Wars? Well, this isn’t a catty women story. Amelia is inviting only very close family and friends so that pretty much meant I’m not invited but Colleen told me she’d like me to attend her wedding. If you’ve read my post about getting a Save The Date card and then being disinvited, it’s better knowing right off the bat that you’re not invited.

Colleen sent me a Save The Date card, and told me that the invite was to come (I have it in hand now, uninvite this time!). I was taking a walk with Colleen one day and, as it is with a lot of women about to get married, she talked about her upcoming wedding. A LOT. I tried to be an excited (and sometimes sympathetic ear) but some days you can really only hear so much about a single topic. She apologized a few times for going on and on about her wedding but I told her that’s ok. It’s a huge event for her and it’s what is occupying her mind the most. So I let her talk without trying to get too frustrated with all the wedding talk.

As we all know, I’m single. The chances of me remaining single for all eternity is looking pretty good at the moment but I’m learning to make peace with that again. Then I got the “single talk.” Colleen repeatedly told me she was giving me a plus one “just in case” I started dating someone by her wedding. I’m pretty damn sure that isn’t going to happen. Since breaking up with Matt I’d gone on a few dates (stories to come), then decided to take a step back from dating for a while and re-learn being on my own. Colleen really wants me to bring a plus one to her wedding. She told me it could also just be a friend because I wouldn’t know anyone at the wedding. OK, fair enough but I told her I’d be fine going to her wedding and not know anyone. But then, very randomly, out of the blue, she said, “There aren’t going to be any single guys there. We invited one guy that’s single but I think he’s bringing someone and he’s kind of a player.”

Singel AF

I’m pretty sure I had a brainfart moment wondering if I’d heard that correctly. And just like that I suddenly felt very self-conscious (and sligntly bad) about being single. Yeah, I know, I’m in my 30s and single. All my friends are married/about to be married and/or have kids. The only friend I have that’s still single is somewhere around a decade younger than me. Maybe Colleen wanted to see me burst in to tears??? Just kidding. I know she’s trying to look out for me and make sure I’m not the awkward loner staring at a potted plant at her wedding but I didn’t really need her to point out that I’m single as fuck. I already know that!

Thus began the hunt to find someone who’d come to the wedding with me. I told a co-worker and we jokingly talked about hiring an escort. Aside from the cost (which I’m sure I can’t afford), I’d just feel awkward around that guy (though I’m sure it’d make a hilarious blog post). I stumbled upon rent-a-friend but decided I didn’t want to spend the money on that either. I asked my friend who said no because she’s “dedicated” to her son. She literally said “I’m dedicated to M–.” Story of my life. So, on went the search. Another co-worker said she’d leave her daughter with the father and come with me but I didn’t want to bug her about making arrangements with her ex-husband. Luckily a co-worker/friend of mine said she’d come with me to the wedding (though I jokingly said I’d ditch her if I started dating someone by June). Hallelujah for friends willing to drop things to come with me to what is for sure as hell going to feel like an awkward event for me to attend. 

However, how that I got me my date I don’t think Colleen is impressed I’m bringing a female friend and not a boyfriend. Oh well, I suppose. We can’t have it all in life. 

I’m sure that I’ll have a story or two about the wedding. Stay tuned, my friends. Stay tuned.

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2 thoughts on “Single AF

  1. It’s so weird wedding dates- how it’s tooootally cool to bring a friend of the opposite gender, even if he’s obviously gay, but kinda sorta weird to bring a friend of the same sex. Was thinking about this with a friend of mine who is going solo to a wedding where her ex will be. Wish I could be her date, but it’d def be a little weird!
    I once had a guy date me for a month and a half pretty much JUST so he could take me to a wedding. He paid for my flight and everything, I got a weekend away in Colorado, some lovely food and a chance to wear a pretty dress! Was only slightly awkward because we both realized that weekend we definitely didn’t have a future…but still managed to have fun!

  2. Not going to lie, I ever so briefly entertained the idea of asking a guy I went out with twice (then kinda, sorta gave a vague hint about not going out with him ever again) to go with me. LOL. Glad the Colorado wedding wasn’t completely awkward and uncomfortable for you! 🙂

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